Alice Has Given Up Trying To Teach Herself To Type...

...at least for the time being.
     Yes, yes, I know; in life only quitters are the real losers, etc. etc.
     I will say, however, in my defense, that:

a) I haven't actually quit; merely postponed it temporarily.
b) the heat has been such that I simply haven't been able to concentrate on much of anything. I feel actually drunk with it; wobbly and leaden, my limbs and brain simply aren't functioning. And in any case, my fingers were so slick with sweat that they kept slipping off the bloody keys.
c) There have been other, more pressing matters (such as The Grandmama getting herself into a muddle with the credit card none of us had previously known she'd got. And mother panicking about a doctors appointment and giving herself a sick migraine. And me having an extra period - and all the loveliness that goes with it - and my sleep pattern being inexplicably buggered up at the same time) demanding my attention.
And
d) mother and I both agree that my initial approach was incorrect. Due to not properly familiarizing myself with the program first, I had no idea how to control it and ended up allowing myself to be galloped along at far too fast a pace for my poor little brain (or fingers) to keep up with.

Anyhoot. Once the worst of the heatwave passes (given Britain's track record I'd say that at most we've got maybe another few weeks of it. And that's only if all the cold lovers like me are really unlucky), I fully intend to knuckle down once again and crack on with it; albeit this time at a much slower, gentler pace.
     So rest easy for now, Mavis (Ms. Beacon and I are on first name terms now). I will be back.

In other news; The Grandmama has acquired a credit card and has been merrily using it to order things from various catalogues. She has also become a "valued customer" of AmazonUK (...yeah).
     This wouldn't be as much of a problem as it is had we actually known about it before hand, but in the intervening few months she has managed to not only to shop until she dropped, but has also gotten herself into a complete mess regarding certain items she had to send back. That was when she bit the bullet and sought outside help (i.e. Mother; who has Power Of Attourney, and me; who has Power Of Being Able To Use Instant Messaging And E-Mail And Talk To The Amazon Customer Service Team).
     Thankfully, after printing out her statements, the amount isn't too prohibitive. Bad; a little under £500 (half of which had already been paid off before we got there), but not as bad as it could have been. Lord knows what would have gotten had Grandmama not gotten herself into a muddle trying to use Amazon's automatic refund system and come to us. It makes me shudder to think about it.

=SIGHS=

She isn't actually doolally, my grandmother - no more than she ever has been, at least - just a shopaholic and utterly hopeless with money.
     That said, I'd like to know which idiot in the banking industry sanctioned an 80+ year old woman that has already officially handed over her financial affairs to her daughter having a 'limitless' credit card. I really would.

     .....Still. I guess this means she's feeling better.....

In other other news;
I have writers block. Work at The Store, even the usually easy parts, is a struggle; I am ending every shift drenched in sweat and even when not at work, I feel in a constant daze. Both mother and I are consuming 2 tiptops and several pints of refrigerated water per day to keep ourselves moving, and as a small personal bit of unpleasantness in addition to feeling dazed I've been blessed with patches of heat rash in various places on my body - including my chin! The horror! - and for the time being my nicely unblemished complexion is ruined. Mother's holiday is doing well; lots of resting, knitting and piano playing (as well as 7-AM starts every day. Lucky cow). We have reached series 5 in our watching of Foyle's War. I have lost the weight I gained and am back on track towards health and happiness. The dog is (finally!) shedding his winter coat and looks like a scruffpot. The cat has dandruff and in the past year her appetite has doubled. My cousin is planning a move to Worcester with the love of her life, while Best Friend 1 is initiating divorce proceedings with hers. Giant daisies are running amok in the little flower patch in our garden and in the main area - the messy barely kept part - we apparently have a crop of potatoes brewing. Mother has temporarily taken over the task of cooking to give me a rest and so far it is going well (two weeks now and we are still alive).

.....And in the backdrop of all of this it is too bloody hot (did I mention that?).

Roll on autumn. Please.

Alice x