~.START.~
Scene is set; Alice is sat
on the train, which is chugging its way towards Worcester. She is on her way to visit Cousin 1, and decides that she has
recovered enough from the events of the day before to respond to the “how’d it
go” questions that Best Friend 2 and Best Friend 3 have been asking. So, she
gets out her mobile, and begins pressing keys. Best Friend 3 is the first to respond, and a conversation takes place...
ALICE: Hi! How goes your Sunday? If you’ve
time to read the essay, I thought I’d fill you in on the events after my date,
okay? …Well, it seemed great at first. We had had a great time and planned on
meeting again. There was even talk of my staying with her overnight and, well,
you know (on the one hand, sex on the 2nd date; VERY soon. On the
other; it’s been 10 years, and boy, did I want to!). So it was great. But then,
things started to go…wrong. She started sending text messages over and over
again, switching between trying to initiate phone sex (NOT my thing) and in not
so many words, basically declaring her undying love. Between the text messages
and two phone calls (which I couldn’t hear properly because my phone is dying)
I learned that we were made for each other, that I was wonderful and lovely (…which
I AM, but…), that we were going to live together A.S.A.P, that we were going to
build a life together and be happy together forever…etc. etc. I tried to tell
her gently that I’m not looking to build a life with anyone just yet – I’ve
only just begun really work on building my own – in reply to which I got a mass
of desperate texts/calls trying to change my mind. …In the end, I had to be
blunt with her. Then, I had to ‘block’ her. The end. X
BEST FRIEND 3:
PMSL*! I’m sorry, but that is just so funny! Oh well, at least you didn’t get
murdered. Don’t worry, you’ll find someone, there are plenty more fish in the
sea. X
ALICE: That’s what the dating website is
called: Plenty More Fish. =shrugs= Oh well, it’s led to a funny story, at
least. Boy, can I pick ‘em. X
…p.s. I’m very glad that I wasn’t murdered, too...
BEST FRIEND 3:
PMSLM**! I guess it’s something to talk about on the next date?? It was an
experience, right? I wonder why she acted like that?
ALICE: I think my profile may have given the
wrong impression (not that that fully excuses her behaviour). I put that I was “looking
for a relationship”. What I meant was that I would like that someday, after
meeting the right girl and taking the time to get to know her, etc. But I
guess, “relationship” is such a big word; it covers a wide range of things…
BEST FRIEND 3: yeah.
It could be taken the wrong way. I’d change that. Can you?
ALICE: oh, done and done. I’ve reworded the ‘about
me’ paragraph carefully, too.
BEST FRIEND 3:
good. Well, I’m glad you didn’t get killed.
ALICE: (chuckling to self) …yeah, me too…
Scene ends; with Alice shaking head ruefully, then burying her
head back in her notepad to continue the bit of The Story she was working on.
~.END.~
* for those blissfully ignorant of the dreaded ‘text speak’,
this translates to Pissing My Self Laughing.
** …Pissing My Self Laughing More…
No comments:
Post a Comment