Overheard At Pizza Hut:

~START~

"...get this, guys: I've got ALL the drink flavours!"

"...BACON!..."

"...Alex, get your face out of the urinal NOW!..."

"...that man has been on his laptop for the past twenty minutes. Who brings a laptop to Pizza Hut? The waitress just gave him a coffee and he's just ignoring it; look..."

"...who knew that so many flavours of SevenUp existed? Strawberry and lime; it's mental!..."

"....the coffee is going to go cold. Look, the foam is melting..."

"...Joe, do NOT copy Alex! Do NOT...boys, I am not kidding, get your faces OUT of there and STOP IT or there will be no ice cream for EITHER of you, I MEAN IT..."

"...  (singsong voice) It's my birthday and I'm going to have chicken, chicken pizza, yay yay yay..."

"...sparkler! Whee!..."

"...seriously, is he going to drink it? It'll be cold! Why doesn't he stop typing for thirty seconds and drink it?..."

"...Amy get OFF that chair before you break your neck! I'll get you another balloon, it doesn't matter!..."

"...Malcom, don't press every button on the drinks despenser. ...I don't care what Gavin did, you don't have to. It will taste vile and you are going to break it if you're not careful..."

"...now, buddy, listen, I've had enough. Either you sit down like a good boy and stop howling for no reason or daddy is going to take you outside. Which is it going to be?..."

"...why doesn't he drink it? It's been sat there for thirty minutes now. IS he going to drink it?..."

"... (whispered) Sara, I dropped my phone into the toilet! Help!..."

"...how on earth did you manage to get mayonaise on your socks?! You had shoes on!?..."

"...and then I dropped it...on his...you know..."

"...the longer I go without it, the more repulsed I am by the idea of it. Is that normal?..."

"...buddy, please, I'm begging you. Ooh, look! The nice man has brought you a balloon! See? Isn't that nice? ...no??..."

"...he isn't going to WASTE the coffee, is he? I mean, that would be a sin!..."

"... (still sing song voice) chicken, chicken pizza; it's coming coming..."

"...Miss Heath, Miss Heath! Brian is stuck!..."

"...do you think it'll work again once it's dried out?..."

"...I dunno, mum hates it when dad does that..."

"...Miss Heath, Miss Heath, he's got his face back in the urinal and he's LICKING it!..."

"...oohyeah! All the flavours again! Well, this time. Turns out I missed one last time...."

"... (delighted squeal) Here is my chicken pizza!..."

"...he wouldn't waste it. I mean, he's paid for it. They're £2.99, I checked. You wouldn't waste a £2.99 coffee... oh, are you going to the loo? Good! Look as you go past and see if he's drunk it while we weren't looking..."

"...let me get this straight, buddy: in your four-year-old brain a neon red balloon does nothing, but give you a half of a soggy breadstick and you're over-the-moon happy?..."

"...well, did you look? Has he drunk it? No?? But he's LEFT!?..."

~END~ 

Alice x

PS: I refuse to say which, if any, of these snippets were uttered by either mother or myself.
     ...Mostly on the grounds that it would make us look like a pair of coffee obsessed busybodies...