...or a pipe directly in front of the house does.
There are men currently sweeping t'house to ascertain which it is.
Watch this space...
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Monday, 26 June 2017
Tuesday, 13 June 2017
Things That Have Made Me Smile Over The Past Week Or So:
* A child saying the phrase: "But mom; I'm not a miniature spider!"
- No. We didn't understand it, either.
* My first performance at Spoken Word.
- I was second on stage, read out three poems, and did pretty darn well, if I don't say so myself.
* A tot in a pushchair, gripping the toes of his little feet with both hands whilst doing this: "wheeeee! =hiccup!= wheeeee! =hiccup!= wheeeee =hiccup="
* The following announcement over the speakers at The Store, made in an effort to encourage the staff into attending the daily briefing that everybody avoids as often as possible:
"this is a staff announcement: can all available members of staff please come to the showroom desk for morning briefing. ... =pause=... There is cake. Thank you."
* The following snippet of conversation overheard as I passed by a man talking into his phone:
"...look, I'm sorry to go on about it, love, but I'm still not clear as to how the hell you managed to BLOW UP A TIRE travelling at 10 miles an hour..."
...and, last but not least...
* Pictures like this:
- No. We didn't understand it, either.
* My first performance at Spoken Word.
- I was second on stage, read out three poems, and did pretty darn well, if I don't say so myself.
* A tot in a pushchair, gripping the toes of his little feet with both hands whilst doing this: "wheeeee! =hiccup!= wheeeee! =hiccup!= wheeeee =hiccup="
* The following announcement over the speakers at The Store, made in an effort to encourage the staff into attending the daily briefing that everybody avoids as often as possible:
"this is a staff announcement: can all available members of staff please come to the showroom desk for morning briefing. ... =pause=... There is cake. Thank you."
* The following snippet of conversation overheard as I passed by a man talking into his phone:
"...look, I'm sorry to go on about it, love, but I'm still not clear as to how the hell you managed to BLOW UP A TIRE travelling at 10 miles an hour..."
...and, last but not least...
* Pictures like this:
...I wonder if I can take a picture of myself taking a picture...
"Okay. 1...2...3... Think!"
"Okay. Now, 1...2...3...Pout!"
"That's it, baby! Work it!"
"Biscuit? Where?"
Thank you.
That is all.
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Wednesday, 31 May 2017
Ah, Kids...
~.START.~
Scene is set; B.C.B.F.L.B is on an escalator, going up. Three boys step on a few seconds after her: a tall one - who appears to be in charge - and two little ones, one of whom is a little bigger than the other and therefore probably a little older than the smallest one.
The following conversation ensues...
OLDER BOY: (authoritatively) keep your feet away from the edge.
YOUNGER BOY: (chiming in) yeah.
YOUNGEST BOY: (bemused) why?
OLDER BOY: 'cause...
YOUNGER BOY: (interrupting) ...'cause if you don't your feet'll get stuck and then you'll die.
OLDER BOY: (wearily) Zack...
YOUNGEST BOY: (indignant) will not!
YOUNGER BOY/ZACK: (deadpan) will so.
YOUNGEST BOY: (trying to sound brave, but now a little doubtful) nah. Only thing'll happen is your foot'll break, that's all.
YOUNGER BOY/ZACK: (with utter confidence) yeah, and then you'll be in so much pain that you'll be in agony and then you'll die.
YOUNGEST BOY: (panicked) Petey?!?
OLDER BOY/PETEY: (annoyed) ZacK! Leave Kevin alone!
YOUNGER BOY/ZACK: ...(laughs)...
Scene ends; with all those present leaving the escalator and going their separate ways.
~.END.~
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Saturday, 27 May 2017
The Previously Unthinkable Has Been Thunked...
And lo, with the gentle and inevitable rising of summer and of warmth, the foretold unspeakable marvel has taken place:
Alice Collison is wearing shorts.
The world hasn't ended yet.
...But, it might...
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Alice Collison is wearing shorts.
The world hasn't ended yet.
...But, it might...
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Why? WHY??
Finally got around yesterday to transferring some of the snippets of Story from my iPad to my computer - it's growing, still; not very quickly (not very quickly at all), but t'is growing - and getting a copy of the poem ready for this coming Friday - I'm planning to attend a poetry reading / music recital / comedy performance thing in Birmingham, and everybody is welcome to do something, so I thought I might give it a go - and in doing so, I made an upsetting discovery: THREE AND A HALF WHOLE PAGES of The Story have, inexplicably, vanished!
I searched through both computer and iPad; I even raided both of my email accounts (as it was a transferred snippet, written originally at the library), but, nothing. I had stupidly deleted the emails once I was done with them, and although I had been meaning to, I hadn't got around to making a backup copy of The Story yet, so; whatever t'was that had happened, I couldn't reverse it.
Gosh, I was upset, I can tell you, both with the situation and with myself.
I know what you're thinking. '...it's only three and a half pages. Just rewrite them, jeeze...'
But it's not as simple as that. Not only can I not remember exactly how those three and a half pages went, but they were in fact one the of what I call Connective Bits. Put simply, it's a section joining up the parts of Story that I find difficult to connect together. What I generally do is to leave a gap and move on, knowing that at some point the Connective Bit will come at some point and I can slot it in later.
Anyway, that's what those three and a half pages were. I can remember bring really pleased that at the Connective had come to me, as it had been stewing away somewhere at the back of my mind for quite a while. I can remember writing it, and tweaking it, and being satisfied with the results. I cam remember the passive irritation that due to a problem with the Internet connection, I had to save the attachment as a draft email rather than send it right away. I can remember sorting that little 1st World Problem out later in the day, and then tweaking the Connective Bit a tad more once I'd inserted it (weird thing; no matter what font the Bit is written in, when it's inserted into Word, it automatically switches to Arial: size 8. I have no clue why, but as I tend to write in Times New Roman: size 12 as a general rule, I find that to be passively irritating too)... I can remember all of that, and yet I can't remember what the heck I actually wrote; which is more than passively irritating, to say the least.
So, I'm having to rewrite it from scratch.
As I said, it may seem a little thing to you, but to me, it isn't.
Anyway! In other news...
* I've had my hair cut nice and short again.
* I've heard back from four of the 8 jobs I'd applied for last week saying "definitely not" and four saying "maybe; don't call us, we'll call you". In the meantime, I've applied for 2 more, and shall keep looking.
* Mother's plan to Save MJ From Himself is still going well.
* It is starting to get warmer. I do not like this, at all.
* In my journey through the world of Excel, I've moved on from Mathematical / Financial Functions and am now working on Complex Functions (joy!).
* We have some new-second-hand furniture which is tall enough for Grandmama to get in and out of comfortably (she is thrilled) but not - as it turns out - wide enough got the dog to curl himself up on comfortably (he is not thrilled).
And that's my week, folks.
Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.
B.C.B.F.L.B x
I searched through both computer and iPad; I even raided both of my email accounts (as it was a transferred snippet, written originally at the library), but, nothing. I had stupidly deleted the emails once I was done with them, and although I had been meaning to, I hadn't got around to making a backup copy of The Story yet, so; whatever t'was that had happened, I couldn't reverse it.
Gosh, I was upset, I can tell you, both with the situation and with myself.
I know what you're thinking. '...it's only three and a half pages. Just rewrite them, jeeze...'
But it's not as simple as that. Not only can I not remember exactly how those three and a half pages went, but they were in fact one the of what I call Connective Bits. Put simply, it's a section joining up the parts of Story that I find difficult to connect together. What I generally do is to leave a gap and move on, knowing that at some point the Connective Bit will come at some point and I can slot it in later.
Anyway, that's what those three and a half pages were. I can remember bring really pleased that at the Connective had come to me, as it had been stewing away somewhere at the back of my mind for quite a while. I can remember writing it, and tweaking it, and being satisfied with the results. I cam remember the passive irritation that due to a problem with the Internet connection, I had to save the attachment as a draft email rather than send it right away. I can remember sorting that little 1st World Problem out later in the day, and then tweaking the Connective Bit a tad more once I'd inserted it (weird thing; no matter what font the Bit is written in, when it's inserted into Word, it automatically switches to Arial: size 8. I have no clue why, but as I tend to write in Times New Roman: size 12 as a general rule, I find that to be passively irritating too)... I can remember all of that, and yet I can't remember what the heck I actually wrote; which is more than passively irritating, to say the least.
So, I'm having to rewrite it from scratch.
As I said, it may seem a little thing to you, but to me, it isn't.
Anyway! In other news...
* I've had my hair cut nice and short again.
* I've heard back from four of the 8 jobs I'd applied for last week saying "definitely not" and four saying "maybe; don't call us, we'll call you". In the meantime, I've applied for 2 more, and shall keep looking.
* Mother's plan to Save MJ From Himself is still going well.
* It is starting to get warmer. I do not like this, at all.
* In my journey through the world of Excel, I've moved on from Mathematical / Financial Functions and am now working on Complex Functions (joy!).
* We have some new-second-hand furniture which is tall enough for Grandmama to get in and out of comfortably (she is thrilled) but not - as it turns out - wide enough got the dog to curl himself up on comfortably (he is not thrilled).
And that's my week, folks.
Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Saturday, 20 May 2017
Three Pieces Of Good News.
FIRST: it turns out that there is a function in Excel that removes the need for the user to type in all of those awful, confusing and frustratingly inconsistent brackets that appear - at times randomly - throughout the formulas.
- I tell you, folk(s), I nearly wept with relief when I unexpectedly found this out.
SECOND: I've restarted my membership of MeetUP online, joined a few groups - not many thus far, and one is 'pending' - and have already arranged three outings.
1. a small art/music evening, held in a cafe in Birmingham.
- apparently it is a yearly event.
2. an evening of bowling fun in Worcester.
- I've already checked; my lack of ability will not be a problem. Nobody else that plans to attend thus far is much cop, either.
3. a workshop in Birmingham called "Let It Go".
- this one is only a possible, and is dependent upon me being able to swap one of my shifts.
Anyhoot! That should widen my horizons a little, shouldn't it?
Get me out and about and meeting people, etc. etc...
THIRD: after a dry spell, job wise (lots of adverts for part time/temporary), things seem to be looking up. I've applied for 8 today.
- I'm afraid, Best Friend 0.5(1), that the one you suggested was not among them. Sorry. Such a position is just not for me (same reasons as the last one).
So, that's good, eh?
A nice end to the week. And next week promises to be even better.
B.C.B.F.L.B x
- I tell you, folk(s), I nearly wept with relief when I unexpectedly found this out.
SECOND: I've restarted my membership of MeetUP online, joined a few groups - not many thus far, and one is 'pending' - and have already arranged three outings.
1. a small art/music evening, held in a cafe in Birmingham.
- apparently it is a yearly event.
2. an evening of bowling fun in Worcester.
- I've already checked; my lack of ability will not be a problem. Nobody else that plans to attend thus far is much cop, either.
3. a workshop in Birmingham called "Let It Go".
- this one is only a possible, and is dependent upon me being able to swap one of my shifts.
Anyhoot! That should widen my horizons a little, shouldn't it?
Get me out and about and meeting people, etc. etc...
THIRD: after a dry spell, job wise (lots of adverts for part time/temporary), things seem to be looking up. I've applied for 8 today.
- I'm afraid, Best Friend 0.5(1), that the one you suggested was not among them. Sorry. Such a position is just not for me (same reasons as the last one).
So, that's good, eh?
A nice end to the week. And next week promises to be even better.
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Sunday, 14 May 2017
In Case Anyone Was Wondering:
Operation 'Teach An Old Dog A New Trick' has been shelved, temporarily, on orders from t'Vet.
There are three reasons for this.
Firstly, since my last post on the subject there has been no further progress in getting Bingo up the mini steps: we are stuck on Step 6 and he is flat out refusing to move past that.
Secondly, Bingo's back isn't making all that much progress in healing, either.
Thirdly, upon The Grandmama arriving to visit him (at the time, unbeknownst to me) as a surprise, we have discovered that Bingo is now averse to even approaching the car - even with his Hands Down Most Utterly Favourite Person In All The World sat in the front seat calling out to him and holding out a tantalizing treat to tempt him with - let alone attempting to get into it.
So! T'Vet has advised us to leave all further training for at least a fortnight, to give the painkillers - now increased by an impressive amount - time to take full effect. Bingo, who despite wanting to please us and enjoying the treats he kept being offered was actually getting rather fed up with our insistence that he climb up two steps to reach a sofa that he had no trouble at all jumping onto, seems relieved by the prospect that we've given up.
He's becoming far less stiff, anyway - if no faster moving - and still appears to be perfectly happy and contented, so that's something.
In other dog related news, Bingo turned 12 Sunday last.
His present this year - yes, he gets one: shut up - was a fluffy toy that we have named 'duck'. As predicted, he was thrilled with his gift, and has taken great pleasure in ripping duck to shreds.
So far, I have fixed duck three times.
In case anyone is wondering why: I do this - knowing what will follow - solely because he enjoys it so much.
And to answer the next question: I shall do as I always do and carry on fixing duck until there is nothing left to fix.
So there.
B.C.B.F.L.B x
There are three reasons for this.
Firstly, since my last post on the subject there has been no further progress in getting Bingo up the mini steps: we are stuck on Step 6 and he is flat out refusing to move past that.
Secondly, Bingo's back isn't making all that much progress in healing, either.
Thirdly, upon The Grandmama arriving to visit him (at the time, unbeknownst to me) as a surprise, we have discovered that Bingo is now averse to even approaching the car - even with his Hands Down Most Utterly Favourite Person In All The World sat in the front seat calling out to him and holding out a tantalizing treat to tempt him with - let alone attempting to get into it.
So! T'Vet has advised us to leave all further training for at least a fortnight, to give the painkillers - now increased by an impressive amount - time to take full effect. Bingo, who despite wanting to please us and enjoying the treats he kept being offered was actually getting rather fed up with our insistence that he climb up two steps to reach a sofa that he had no trouble at all jumping onto, seems relieved by the prospect that we've given up.
He's becoming far less stiff, anyway - if no faster moving - and still appears to be perfectly happy and contented, so that's something.
In other dog related news, Bingo turned 12 Sunday last.
His present this year - yes, he gets one: shut up - was a fluffy toy that we have named 'duck'. As predicted, he was thrilled with his gift, and has taken great pleasure in ripping duck to shreds.
So far, I have fixed duck three times.
In case anyone is wondering why: I do this - knowing what will follow - solely because he enjoys it so much.
And to answer the next question: I shall do as I always do and carry on fixing duck until there is nothing left to fix.
So there.
B.C.B.F.L.B x
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)